Loneliness and Depression

Psychology Today, a leading resource for mental health professionals, defines loneliness “is the state of distress or discomfort that results when one perceives a gap between one’s desires for social connection and actual experiences of it.“

Looking at the mature woman who may have retired, gotten laid off, or quit from work plus may be married, divorced or single as well as our foundation. Life changes from being around friends and coworkers to being home alone thus missing social interaction. Life changes as we mature adults aren’t immune to divorce and to loss of a spouse. Even, lifetime relationships can have one or both partners who feel lonely.

Admittedly, I have suffered from ranges of loneliness with some depression after my divorce years ago and losing my long term employment after 21 years. Both situations I worked hard to change them which I eventually got employment that stuck 1800 miles away and despite active dating, I never settled down again. Each time, I felt like I had no other choice to fight and learn to be content with things that I cannot change. I have experienced days and nights of sleeping all day, being in tears, and crying out to GOD to help. After sometime, I learned to have strength, to have hope and to be content with everyone who’s in my life and with everything that I have. My felines did provide love and stayed with me during my darkest hours. I never went to see a professional nor I used any medications. My mistake.

So, are loneliness and depression related. The Cleveland Clinic located in Cleveland OH describes depression as a “common mental health condition that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and changes on how you think, sleep, eat and act. It is treatable with talk therapy, medication or both. Feeling lonely provokes sadness and can change on your behaviors.

If you are feeling loneliness and are getting depressed about it, I encourage you to talk to a trusted friend and/or seek medical/professional help like I should HAVE done. If it’s been long term or lost hope or both, please don’t be ashamed to ask for help. Take good care of yourself because you are important, you are valued and you are worthy.

Thank you,

Leslie Elizabeth David.

Motown Music

With all the media coverage regarding the Detroit Lions lately, I’d thought that I would share a story that happened to me yesterday. It made me homesick for my birthplace and most of my childhood of Detroit and its metro area.

At work on the phone, I noticed the last name of an older gentleman who was asking questions about the business. I told him that his last name is uncommon but I recognized from when I lived in Detroit.

He’s first cousin is one of the original members of the music group, Temptations, who I listened to most of my childhood and now occasionally on YouTube. It was a pleasure just talking to him about him and his relationship to his famous cousin. Truthfully, I believe that he never expected anyone to recognize his last name and to connect the dots. My own supervisor didn’t know who I was talking about, who I believed has missed out on the best music ever. Later on, I shared with a friend who’s Dad was huge in the 90s with soulful music and credits Motown as his inspiration and will share with him about my conversation.

For protection of those involved, unfortunately, I cannot give names out. Truthfully, odd stuff happens to me on occasion. So, even if you choose the correct member of the group, I cannot and will not confirm. Thanks for understanding.

In closing, our childhood growing up during the best music ever lives in our hearts and on YouTube while many groups are still touring or have taken residence in Las Vegas. Be alert because you never know who you might run into.

Cheers!

Leslie Elizabeth David.

Truth

Truth defined by the Oxford dictionary as, the quality or state of being true, that which is true or in accordance with fact or reality.

What people don’t understand is that the truth always reveals itself at the worst time for those who are trying to hide it and the best time for those who are seeking it. The truth isn’t what you make it, it is of what is.

Truth is there’s no such thing as a, “little white lie,” because it becomes a story on its own of one lie after another. The lies become bigger and will eventually ends relationships when the truth comes out no matter how much effort the liar did to stop of it from coming out.

The simple wisdom of teaching your children and grandchildren is that the truth, although it might hurt the feelings of them and others, is far less greater pain than a lie. Relationships are built and last on core values such as telling the truth no matter how painful. Speaking it with genuine love and kindness works.

Growing up, my parents and siblings got mad at me for speaking the truth from the smallest issues to the big ones. I was told that nobody wants to hear the truth, they want to hear something that makes them feel good. Needless to say, my relationships with my siblings are not strong because we have different values on truth.

The truth isn’t always negative either like of being told that you love someone and that the person loves you back.

Over the weekend maybe it’s time to confess the truth to yourself and maybe someone who you haven’t been completely honest with.

Thank you.

Leslie Elizabeth David.

The Detroit Lions

Having been born in Detroit and raised in the metro area until I was 15 years old before moving up north, I was fortunate enough to attend games on Thanksgiving Day and other games.

My memory goes back to when the Lions played outside near the Detroit River long before the Pontiac Silverdome and Barry Sanders. Plus, when Coach Dan Campbell played for three seasons which the Lions lost every single game. Heartbreaking.

To me, Coach Dan Campbell is there for his team to come along the side of each player to bring out the best in each one individually. He takes responsibility when things go wrong and praises the team when things go right. Players respect and trust him.

The victories of the Lions plus the Red Wings and Pistons all having great seasons this year have given the City of Detroit to shine under continuous scrutiny. Now, thousands of people are visiting my hometown and having fun.

Looking forward to the future of the City of Detroit, all professional sports teams and the people who live and work there.

Thank you.

Leslie Elizabeth David.

Authentic

The Oxford Dictionary for authentic, “of undisputed origin; genuine.”Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines it as 1) not false or imitation 2) true to one’s own personality, spirit or character. Being one’s authentic self is thus being our true genuine self to ourselves and to others.

No, big deal right? For years in professional lives no matter if we worked in an office or on an assembly line, we are put into situations where we must adhere to rules of “work culture” of following the written rules and, more importantly, the unwritten ones from meeting production goals to how we interact with others. Even with one lifetime employer or a few place of employment, we had to give in or not reveal our true selves in order to work and to avoid harassment. Some are able to be truly genuine throughout their careers and have flourished.

When a person retires, one may say that “I have given my life towards the company and this is what I got,” or “I changed myself to fit it to make it easier on myself at work without being singled out,” truthfully, I heard both from on both white collar and blue collar employees.

One of the reasons for retirement is that it allows the individual to live the rest of his/her life how that person feels most true and genuine to him/herself. Authentic.

Personally, I have made adjustments to follow work culture to not be harassed for being a “free spirit,” but after work is when I have allowed my genuine self to shine by doing what I love of laughing with lifetime friends on Facebook, selling clothes on a closet app, hanging out with felines Bella and Luna (more on them later), and traveling to areas of the country which I have never been like Connecticut and Providence RI plus most of Texas.

For the rest of your years, I hope that you can be your authentic self and live peacefully and joyfully. Break free from the mold with your retirement or in your time away from work. Be authentic.

Thank you,

Leslie Elizabeth David.

Sunday Night

Hello. How are you feeling right now about Monday? Are you excited about your day about tomorrow? Or, are you dreading it? Your honest response says a lot about how you feel about your position, your coworkers, your superiors and owners or executive management. My hope is that you’re excited to start your week with people who inspire you and who challenge you to be your very best.

Myself, throughout most of my working life, my joy was/is found outside of my workplace. While working full time in banking and finance, I achieved ACE certification for fitness, earned my MBA and Six Sigma Greenbelt. Plus, more importantly, friends have been great although I have learned to be joyful and happy on my own terms.

Truthfully, I don’t look forward to my work although I’m grateful for it because it pays the bills. Believe it’s called adulting of doing the things you have to in order to live.

Currently, I work full time with a thirty minute commute each way but I find my joy in writing because it’s a sense of freedom and sense of peace during the process. In addition, I have an online closet which I have sold items and met some awesome people along the way. Plus, a closet full of beautiful clothing which is more than I ever imagined. The people who I have met while earning my milestones have been mentors who are now my friends and my customers who with some, I have learned their story. Unfortunately, I cannot give out my closet name or any of my followers.

We don’t know what 2025 is going to deliver us collectively and individually so I hope that you and I both take it one day at a time to savor each moment. From my experience, good things are always a blessing and even the difficult times can be valuable because we gain wisdom and perspective.

Take good care of yourself.

Thanks again,

Leslie Elizabeth David.



Importance

My hope and prayer for you is that the people who are in your life consider yourself important to take care of things that are necessary to do your job and/or to be accountable personally.

My experience was that the car that I drive for short business trips for work while at work wasn’t taken care of like scraping the ice off of the windshield before I had to use it. Documents needed to be dropped off at a certain time which put me in a crunch because I had to use my personal car. My workplace, I rarely socialize and focus on my assigned tasks. I do my job well by getting things done timely and I am rarely late. Not popular at work and maybe not liked because I don’t share about my life and stick only about work.

There’s times when I think rather to give notice when the time comes for me to move on. Days like today, I go with no notice. My employer is rated horribly by some job postings sites. Because of my age, it would be difficult to find a job that pays well and the hours I have.

Grateful for the weekend so I can take care of myself. Thank you for allowing me to vent. Please share your story good or bad of your employer Happy if you have a great employer and consider yourself blessed.

Thank you.

Leslie Elizabeth David.

Snow Daze

Today at work, plans changed due to some cold and snowy weather which I’m used to but not in the area that I live now. Got to get home early before the second part of the storm hits.

Being from a northern State which could easily handle the weather here is something to get used to. Grateful that my employer chose the safety of the staff instead of us possibly facing danger on the way home.

During high school especially the year of 1978, my high school and other schools in the district shut down for record number of snow days thus putting in jeopardy some seniors who could lose scholarships and acceptance to higher education.

Thank you for sticking with me as I am on a path unknown with the blog. Don’t think I hit my groove yet.

Be safe out there!

Leslie Elizabeth David.


Work

Work. What is your first thought? Was it about your best employer or worst? Have you worked for the same organization your entire career?

When people who talk about their best experience, many would say it’s the people who were there that made it special. But, I believe that it’s more than that such as well defined roles and expectations in writing that creates the work environment. I have worked in such environments and it was a joy.

My current situation is the opposite of undefined roles and responsibilities which nothing is written down that ultimately causes confusion and has lead to litigation in court. It’s a small local family owned business with less than one hundred employees that grew from one location and a few people. Technology is a constant problem too of documents not printing well. Plus, turnaround time is longer compared to our competitors who are bigger and faster plus sometimes better.

The lack of defined rules have caused problems in relationships between people who become romantically involved and also in the scope of workplace harassment. The focus seems more on first more than the latter unless owners fear that they could be sued. Yes, I have been targeted and I have journaled my experiences in case it warrants further action.

Realistically at my age, finding a job with the hours and the pay would be difficult. I have chosen not to socialize much with colleagues and I have chosen to remain quiet outside of work discussions. When I first started, I did speak truth about the process and procedures which I got put in my place from it. Afterwards, I chose to keep my opinions to myself and to not discuss my personal life with of anything of value.

Thankful for my life outside of work where I have a few trusted friends and my fur babies plus an online closet and writing. It balances the good and the bad.

If you work in a toxic environment, how do you cope? Do you have a side hustle to fulfill your dreams?

Thank you again for your time.

Leslie Elizabeth David.