Men

My topic is about one of the most interesting topics to women is men. Our experiences differ with each other about men. We all have our stories to tell on how we found the one or that we’re looking or, like myself, I found content being on my own.

Growing up, I always dreamed of finding the one. In my younger years, my crushes include Marvin Gaye, David Ruffin from the Temptations, Michael Jackson younger years and John Denver. Spending most of my childhood in the metro Detroit area and being born in Highland Park, music more than sports influenced my young crushes.In my teen years, my crush was on a classmate who we shared mutual friends and who was always kind to me although he dated a cheerleader while he played football. Years later in Nashville on my honeymoon, I would see him again because he recognized me from across the room.

College years was more of sleeping around my sophomore year and beyond because I was at a private college where most of the male students were from out of State and some had girlfriends at home. Personally, it was something which I did on occasion because I felt lonely. I transferred from a 2 year junior college with dormitories to a private four year college big in the auto industry. My freshman year, I did date sporadically with a future pilot for a beer company but he ended it to date and eventually marry a girl who had a crush on him who grew up with him and went to the same high school and were from the same town. With the birth of MTV while I was in college, my crushes included Eddie Van Halen and Phil Collin’s.

Post college, I met a man at a bar who I would eventually marry although I was explicitly warned against because I didn’t know the person who was warning me thus lack of trust. The woman who raised him, not his birth Mother, played a huge role in our split plus his infidelities. Working in a financial institution at the time of our divorce, I got to know a few men who visited weekly. One, I had a crush on because we are the same ethnicity and from the same town, but he was dangerous with his after work activities. The other two who also visited the financial institution where I worked weekly were both closer to our personalities fitting each other. One ended meeting someone who I was/am happy for but the other remains single. Near the end of my employment, I shared that likely I would be moving to Texas which he told me where he cousin lived. He did tell me that I was a lady but he dates “factory whores” so that it wouldn’t be right for either of us. I did see him once but I refused to acknowledge his beeping. His cousin doesn’t live far away.

With work being a conflict of interest, I found a had a strong crush on a financial examiner at my work for years. When he learned about how I felt about him, he admitted that he had one for me. His energy was of pure sex appeal for me although he wasn’t the most gorgeous man that I was interested in. For years, I secretly wondered about him. One day, I admitted to my supervisor/friend about it because I trusted her and still do. She asked me if she could tell him which I gave her the okay to share. Come to find out, he had a crush me too but conflict of interest stopped us. Later, I moved to Texas which we kept in touch but ended it because nothing ever changed.

Musically, my celebrity crushes include Michael Bolton whose music got me through a divorce and who later I missed a chance to meet him in Detroit. Phil Collin’s still a crush. In college, I did work for an outdoor music theatre that I was near many of the music makers in the 80s. Michael McDonald and Peter Cetera were my favorites. Jon Bon Jovi and Eddie Van Halen were huge to me as well as I imagine some of you. Oddly, I never connected with actors of the big or the small screens although “Friends” which everyone had their person who was a crush or who was relatable.

In my life now and in the past, I have grown content being on my own with my cats. Yes, I appreciate the handsome man with bonus points of a personality and soul that makes him unforgettable. My heart hopes that person who I hope that he is happy and content no matter his profession or life’s work.

What are your experiences with men? What kind of wisdom have you shared with your daughters and granddaughters about men and relationships?

Thank you,

Leslie Elizabeth David.